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God in Search of Man Bava Metzia 30 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 29th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses an important exemption in the mitzvah to return a lost object. Should the person be of a dignified status, and lost items be of such a nature that the person would not even pick up his own possessions in those circumstances, he is then exempt. For example, imagine a bag of apples that is scattered all over the street, and requires bending down on one’s hands and knees to retrieve them. It is very possible t …
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Speaking Up Against Sin Bava Metzia 31 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 29th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the biblical directive to rebuke a sinner. The verse states (Vayikra 19:16): “הוֹכֵ֤חַ תּוֹכִ֙יחַ֙ אֶת־עֲמִיתֶ֔ךָ You shall admonish, and indeed admonish your fellow country man.” Biblical Hebrew has an idiomatic word form where a verb is repeated, presumably to connote emphasis. The halachic implications of this emphasis are discussed in our Gemara: …
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Renewal through Routine (Parshat Tzav)
Author: Elan Javanfard, L.M.F.T.
March 28th, 2024
In Parshat Tzav, we delve into the detailed instructions for the Kohanim regarding the daily Korbanot and rituals within the Mishkan. Among these instructions is the commandment regarding the removal of the ashes from the altar. This seemingly mundane task holds within it profound symbolism and echoes of the psychological concept of renewal. The passuk at the beginning of the Parsha (6:3) states: “The priest shall dress in linen raim …
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Sarcasm in the Torah Bava Metzia 29 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 28th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis warns of various careless financial practices: And Rabbi Yoḥanan says: In the case of one whose father bequeathed him a great deal of money and he seeks to lose it, he should wear linen garments, and should use glass vessels, and should hire laborers and not sit with them to supervise. A unique feature of this Talmudic passage is that it seems to be resorting to sarcasm. Sarcasm is a particular human style of commu …
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The Circle of Life Bava Metzia 28 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 27th, 2024
Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses the obligation to announce a lost object to alert the owner. One opinion is that it should be through the entire annual cycle of all three Jewish holidays, Pesach, Shavuous and Succos. Presumably, since people make pilgrimages to Eretz Yisrael at least once a year, this will allow for sufficient interaction that hopefully the person who lost the object will be notified. Akeidas Yitschok (69) d …
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Miracles, Magic or Technology? Bava Metzia 27 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 26th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the reluctance of a person to loan a wallet or purse to another person, because it is a bad sign. That is, it symbolically portends that he will give his money to another person. Tosafos (ibid) raises a concern that this paying attention to signs should be under the prohibition against divination, as stated in (Vayikra 19:26). Tosafos answers, this is similar to what is taught in Shabbos (67a), …
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Mass Formation Psychosis Bava Metzia 26 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 25th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses social group dynamics. If a coin fell from one of three people, the finder is not obligated to return it. What is the reason? The person from whom the coin fell certainly despairs of recovering it. He says, “After all, two other people were with me. If I seize this one, he will say: I did not take it. And if I seize that one, he will say: I did not take it.” Since he cannot make a definitive cla …
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The Torah Speaks Through Us, and in Fact, is Us Bava Metzia 25 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 24th, 2024
Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses a teaching of Rabbi Yitschok Migdla’ah: שְׁלֹשָׁה מַטְבְּעוֹת זֶה עַל גַּב זֶה. אָמַר רַבִּי יִצְחָק מַגְדְּלָאָה: וְהוּא שֶׁעֲשׂוּיִין כְּמִגְדָּלִין. תַּנְיָא נָמֵי הָכִי: מָצָא מָעוֹת מְפוּזָּרוֹת – הֲרֵי אֵלּוּ שֶׁלּוֹ, עֲשׂו …
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Shalach Manos to an Enemy Bava Metzia 32 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 22nd, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses circumstances where one is obligated to assist a fellow Jew in loading and unloading his beast. The Gemara established that all things considered equal, one should assist in unloading a beast first, before assisting in loading. Logic has it, that the beast and even the owner, is in greater distress when needing to unload versus loading, since the packages might fall or the beast might become injured. …
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The Harm of Self-Deception Bava Metzia 23 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 22nd, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses why a Talmid Chacham has special credibility; he never lies except for purposes of modesty and privacy. However, even a meticulously honest Torah sage is permitted to alter the truth under circumstances that would violate privacy or modesty, such as if he wants to modestly hide his wisdom, he may publicly deny his achievements. Additionally, he may use deception to prevent others from becoming aware of his and hi …
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Doomed or Not, It is Up to God Bava Metzia 24 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 22nd, 2024
Our Gemara on amud aleph speaks of situations where an object faces inevitable doom, such as a lion is about to consume a sheep. Even if this is in front of the owners and they protest that they are not giving up, since the consensus reality is that the objects are doomed, it is a de facto giving up (see Shulchan Aruch CM 259:7). The rescuer may take full possession of the object. Yismach Moshe (Shemos 30) uses this legality as …
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Minor Issues Bava Metzia 22 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 21st, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the legal status of minors, who do not possess the mental discernment to give proper consent, therefore they cannot forgive a debt or even waive an entitlement. “Yasmi lav bnei mechila ninhu.” The G”RA uses this idea to understand an emphasis made by the verse in Mishley (23:10): אַל־תַּ֭סֵּג גְּב֣וּל עוֹלָ֑ם וּבִשְׂדֵ֥י יְ֝תוֹמִ֗ים …
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Affection in Ritual Gratitude (Parshat Vayikra)
Author: Elan Javanfard, L.M.F.T.
March 20th, 2024
Parshat Vayikra begins the Sefer that will discuss all the laws pertaining to Korbanot, Kohen duties, and guidance towards holiness. The Sefer is also referred to as Torat Kohanim, largely in part due to the description of the sacrifices performed in the Mishkan. In the midst of these sacrifices, we learn about the "Shelamim – Peace Offering," which holds profound significance, not only in ritual but also in its psychological implications, …
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Buried Treasure Bava Metzia 21 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 20th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the behavioral psychology of money. One is more likely to become quickly aware of losing currency in comparison to other objects. Since it is the way of people to constantly feel their pockets and check if their money is there, if one found money in the street, he may assume the owner already became aware of the loss. This has ramifications in terms of the obligation to return lost items, as the owner …
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Seeing is Believing Bava Metzia 20 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 19th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud aleph discusses the legal status of documents called “Shtarei Berirun”. According to one opinion, is a written record of each litigant’s claims. The straightforward understanding of why the claims are written and agreed upon is that this way neither party can retract and modify their claims. (Rashbam, Bava Basra 168a, “Shtarei”.) There also can be a psychological reason for this …
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Cognitive Bias or Sholom Bayis? Bava Metzia 19 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 18th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the laws concerning a death-bed gift. Since the person is giving away his possessions with the tacit understanding that he is mortally ill, should he recover, his gifts are retracted. The Divrei Mahari relates this (Toldos Bereishis 25:30-34) to Esav’s selling of his rights to the firstborn. וַיָּ֥זֶד יַעֲקֹ֖ב נָזִ֑יד וַיָּבֹ֥א עֵשָׂ֛ו …
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Inside or Outside? Bava Metzia 18 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 17th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis describes a rabbi’s quest for the correct halakha as “Nafak, Dak, Ve-ashkach - He went out, examined it, and discovered.”How does one “go out” and discover a thought? Is this not something that should be discovered by an inward journey? Tosafos Yom Tov (2:9) says it refers to an intellectual journey. Midrash Shmuel (ibid) suggests it is a going out, because it is a letting go of a …
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What Do the Dead Know? Bava Metzia 16 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 15th, 2024
Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses the idea that a repentant thief may be disturbed that his reputation as a thief would be discovered after his death. This implies that dead people have an awareness of the goings on in the physical world. However this is subject to debate in Gemara Berachos (18b) with a number of incidents with various sagely and pious persons, the dead and the living. In one case, a man receives messages from a deceased …
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Buried Treasure Bava Metzia 17 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 15th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis used a particular idiom to describe the discovery of a novel Torah idea: “Drawing up the pearl underneath the clay shard.” Some understand this as a metaphor coming from pearl divers, who find pearls hidden under clay-like clods under the sea (see Tosafos ibid). I will reflect on this metaphor. The idea that intellectual activity involves a deep dive, associated with risks is certainly meaningful. One ca …
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Redemption Unveiled (Parshat Pekudei)
Author: Elan Javanfard, L.M.F.T.
March 14th, 2024
Parshat Pekudei, the final portion of the book of Exodus, provides us with a profound exploration of the psychological journey toward redemption. As we delve into the details of the construction of the Mishkan, we find ourselves leading to the close of Sefer of Shemot gaining clarity on collective redemption for Bnei Yisrael. In his introduction to the Sefer, the Ramban makes comments that, "The Book of Shemot is dedicated to the first Gal …
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Medication or Therapy
Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW
March 14th, 2024
Dear Therapist: I have a specific fear that I have a hard time with but it isn't something that I really have to face very frequently. Let's say it's flying. It's not something I do very often but when I need to it's really hard. I was prescribed a medication I can take from my doctor and I can use it before flying and I feel ok. Is this a good enough way to deal with it or would it be better to invest in therapy to get rid of the fear? Would the …
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What, Me Intellectualize? Well, Come to Think of it...
Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW
March 14th, 2024
Dear Therapist: I have been wondering about a friend who is very smart but is still struggles with motivation. He has been confiding in me recently but I think that he is very focused on philosophical reasons for his unhappiness, like the purpose of life, but doesn't pay enough attention to his emotions. It's hard to tell really but I am wondering if you could give me some pointers in how to steer him for the proper help. Thanks. Response: …
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Therapy? Very Funny!
Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW
March 14th, 2024
Dear Therapist: Thank you so much for your weekly column. I enjoy hearing your different perspectives. I was wondering if lekavod Purim you could share your thoughts on humor and mental health. Does a good sense of humor help people in dealing with difficulties? How does this work? Is this something that can be developed or do you either have it or not? Additionally, I think for most of us we imagine therapy as a serious somber thing, i …
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Gifts and Intimacy Bava Metzia 15 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 14th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses an interesting case where a man attempts to enact marriage to a person to whom he is forbidden, such as a sister. Usually marriage is enacted via an exchange of an object of value (classically, a gold ring). In this situation, since the marriage is obviously impossible, what did he intend to do with the object of value or the money? This is subject to a dispute between Rav and Shmuel: Rav says: The money h …
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The Unforgivable Bava Metzia 14 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 13th, 2024
Our Gemara on amud aleph asserts a principle of human nature that is used to validate numerous halachic presumptions throughout Shas: “A person will not voluntarily waste their money.” Thus, if there are certain obvious omissions in a contract, we do not assume the person agreed to such unfavorable terms, and we consider if it was written, In another Gemara Kesuvos (36b) a similar presumption is made regarding a Co …
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The Frustrations of Daily Life Bava Metzia 13 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 12th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the status of a promissory note that was lost and found. Ordinarily, these notes with signatures of witnesses have a presumption of validity. However, since this document was dropped, that in and of itself weakens its legitimacy. (Perhaps the loan was canceled or not even enacted, and it was discarded and not lost at all.) Therefore, if one finds this document, he may not be able to return it to the lender, as p …
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Fathers and Roughhousing Psychology of the Daf Bava Metzia 12
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 11th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses why a found item of a minor belongs to the father: “Because the minor does not intend to acquire it for himself, as when he finds it, he runs with it to his father.” The propensity of this young boy speaks of a form of attachment that fathers specifically enact. A father might toss his child in the air, simultaneously terrifying and delightfing him or her. While mother stands for safety and nu …
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Hidden Treasure, But Open Suffering Bava Metzia 11 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 10th, 2024
Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses the ability of a courtyard to acquire objects for its owner without his awareness. However, Shulchan Aruch (CM 269) rules that if it is an unexpected object, then it does not acquire it for him, such as hidden treasure. In Vayikra (14:34) the Torah speaks about tozraas blemishes that will afflict your houses, “upon your entry into the land of Canaan.” This odd phraseology sounds li …
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Does Religion Make People Anxious? Bava Metzia 9 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 8th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the method of acquisition known as “chatzer = courtyard”, where an object can be acquired by being placed in the person’s domain. A mobile courtyard, such as vessels to be acquired that are placed on one’s moving animal, cannot acquire the objects. However, a boat is not considered mobile despite moving on the water, as the subjective experience is one of relative stability and stand …
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Dispense With the Middleman Bava Metzia 10 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 8th, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses an important and recurring theme in Jewish religious philosophy that has halachic and metaphorical implications. Under many circumstances, an employee or laborer can quit on the spot. The rationale is that God wants no Jewish person to be encumbered by any mortal. The Gemara declares: It is written: “For to Me the children of Israel are slaves; they are My slaves whom I brought forth out of the land …
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Decisions...Decisions...Decisions?
Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW
March 7th, 2024
Dear Therapist: My son has always had a hard time making decisions. Even when it comes to making small choices, like what to order in a restaurant, it's a whole esek. He really never had to make too many serious choices in his life, he went to the same yeshiva straight through and to Eretz Yisroel together with his friends. Same with camp, there wasn't much choice. I am worried as he gets ready for shidduchim that he will have a rough …
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Should I Choose My Husband or My Parents?
Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW
March 7th, 2024
Dear Therapist: My husband has a very difficult time getting along with my parents. I am not sure what the source of this is but it's been like that for a while. My husband is a great father and wonderful husband and man, and my parents are wonderful too. We all have our quirks and somehow my husband and parents just grate on each other the wrong way. We have somehow managed this over the first 5 years of our marriage but it seems to be get …
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The Divine Blueprint: Executive Planning (Parshat Vayakhel)
Author: Elan Javanfard, L.M.F.T.
March 7th, 2024
Parshat Vayakhel focuses on Moshe Rabeynu addressing Bnei Yisrael as he provides them with the instructions, given in the previous Parshot, related to constructing the Mishkan. In describing the items created for the Mishkan, what becomes clear is that the more important items were left to be created last. The Parsha describes how after the structure was completed then the Ark, Cover, Table, and Menorah were made. As we reflect on the proc …
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Is There a Natural Moral Sense? Bava Metzia 8 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 7th, 2024
Our Gemara on amud aleph makes a seemingly contradictory assertion that a deaf mute is lacking in enough intelligence or discernment to acquire possessions. The rabbis enacted a ruling that regardless, they should be allowed to possess objects. This was in order to forestall and protect a vulnerable population (the mentally impaired) from financial abuse. If two people pick up an ownerless object at the same time, they acquire it jointly, e …
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Fringe Benefits of Mitzvos Bava Metzia 7 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 6th, 2024
Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses a situation of two people, in dispute regarding possession of a cloak made with gold threads on certain parts, and how it should be divided fairly. The literal word used for the cloak is “talis”. Does the Gemara really mean a Talis, the garment which is a mitzvah to wear with Tzitzis fringes attached? Possibly, as it may be that Jews routinely wore four cornered garments as a standard, and did …
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Your Attitude Counts Bava Metzia 6 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 5th, 2024
Our Gemara on amud beis discusses the procedure of tithing animals. Animals born from this year's cycle are put in a corral, and one by one, pass through a gate, counted by a staff. Every tenth sheep is tagged with a red mark and becomes masser (Mishna Bechoros 9:7). If a counted sheep somehow jumps over the gate and returns back to the non-tithed group, the entire group is now rendered exempt from any further tithing procedures …
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Taming the Beast Within Bava Metzia 5 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 3rd, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the parameters of the prohibition against jealously desiring the possessions of another. According to the simple reading of our Gemara, this prohibition applies even when the person is willing to make full payment and purchase the object. If so, is it ever permitted to see something that belongs to another and offer to purchase it? Perhaps it is not allowed to initiate an offer to buy items that are not for comme …
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It’s Like Deja Vu, All Over Again Bava Metzia 4 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 3rd, 2024
Our Gemara discusses various aspects of a unique kind of oath, known as Gilgul Shevua, which we can roughly translate as “A rolled-on Oath.” When a defendant is obligated to make an oath to defend their claim, the plaintiff has the opportunity to levy additional accusations, compelling the defendant to take oaths on those matters as well. Remarkably, this applies even when the subsequent accusations lack substantial legal basis, …
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The Mother of Intention Bava Metzia 2 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 1st, 2024
The Gemara on this Amud discusses the proper way to adjudicate a dispute where two parties claim ownership over an object. Sometimes the remedy is to mandate that it be divided. However, that is only when there are grounds to consider each claim as equally valid, and possibly that both are equal legitimate owners. But if one party had full possession of the object, and the other had no proof other than his claim, we would not divide the obj …
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Justified Manipulation Bava Metzia 3 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
March 1st, 2024
Our Gemara on Amud aleph uncharacteristically asks why the Torah obligates an oath by a person who partially admits, but exempts the person who flat out denies the claim. Usually the Gemara asks the “what”, but not the “why.” For example, a Gilgul Shevua, on the face of it, makes little sense. (An additional oath, levied on the defendant once he already is obligated in a first oath, even if a second claim on the part …
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