Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

September 17th, 2020

“Every year, I struggle with this, when the Yomim Nora’im come around. I want G-d to forgive my misdeeds, so I need to forgive others. And I really try to. If someone owes me money or hurt my feelings, I can really let it go. I’m not a spiteful person; I don’t’ have enemies. But there’s this one thing. My daughter’s teacher in high school- a Rabbi, by title, said and did awful things- not just to her. We …
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Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

September 14th, 2020

Dear _____,   Well, it’s been quite a year. At this time, we have a custom to take interpersonal stock and make amends. Thank you for entrusting me with your thoughts, feelings, and goals. It’s a privilege to work with you. I believe and hope we are accomplishing. Going to therapy involves courage and vulnerability, and I try to honor that, and treat it with care. But I’m a fallible human, and I need to apologize- for the t …
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Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

September 9th, 2020

It’s September/ Elul, and children everywhere are yanking out their uniforms, knapsacks, paperwork, and supplies, packing up lunches and snacks, and getting ready to rejoin the classroom scene. Hustling out to the bus stop, or listening out for the carpool honk, or hopping on bikes, rushing to be on time for the morning bell. “Bye! Love you- have a great day; learn well!” (One of my favorite aspects of homeschooling is no longer …
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Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

August 31st, 2020

For those of you who have been reading this blog for a while, you may have noticed that while I occasionally share examples from my own experiences, there is very little here about the personal details of my life. Part of the professional training that we undergo as part of our education, is the importance of boundaries. In a therapy session, the dialogue is supposed to be focused solely on the client and for the client. Any self-disclosure on th …
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Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

August 19th, 2020

Hey, parents! How are you holding up?? With schools scrambling to formulate and convey their plans to reopen, many parents find themselves faced with the mixed blessing dilemma of choice. Do you send your kids to school in masks and small group capsules, with modified schedules, and stressed out teachers, everything unknown and uncertain as to protocols and risks? Do you opt for the zoom-schooling, distance learning improv that was sampled last y …
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Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

August 12th, 2020

Do you want to work on your relationship in therapy, but have a partner who just doesn’t want to go? Well, you’re not alone. This is a super common and frustrating problem.   The bad news: You can’t generally “make” people want to go to therapy, and even if you technically get them in the door, it’s really, really, hard to help someone who doesn’t want to be helped.   The good news: You may have …
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Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

July 29th, 2020

  This week, we sit shiva for our shattered world. This week we mourn our broken homes. Our temple was destroyed, and even now we continue to watch the walls burn around us. The Churban didn’t just happen millennia ago, but we are taught by Chazal that the damage is ongoing. Hatred, strife, and ignorance fan the flames of destruction, pain, abandonment, and abuse. We don’t see the fire and violence engulfing the actual Temple tod …
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Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

July 19th, 2020

  Much to my people’s chagrin, we have finally been outed as the nefarious villains that we are.   I feel the safest course of action is to just come forward and confess.   Our grandiose schemes aim for diabolical goals such as world peace, healing the sick, and feeding the poor.   My own agenda for world domination begins with education. I believe in trying to brainwash innocent people across the world into learni …
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Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

July 3rd, 2020

Gittel and Shuey have been married for almost 10 years. They get along fairly well, and are kept busy with their three little ones and their demanding jobs. They’ve come to discuss the ostensible problem of Gittel’s low libido.   “I don’t know what we’re doing wrong,” Shuey began. “I try different ways to give her pleasure, but she just doesn’t seem to be able to enjoy. Her body doesn&rsq …
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Author: Elisheva Liss, LMFT

June 25th, 2020

When Korach Tried to Defund the Police As a kid, I remember secretly identifying with Korach’s thinking. Didn’t he just want equality? A place at the table? Was that so bad? Who decides who gets to be in charge? Why can’t there be committees and dialogue about roles? Even to this day, there is a part of me that bucks against authority, rules, and structured hierarchy. In middle school, we once had one of those situations where …
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