I am happy to announce my NEW LOCATION in FLATBUSH.

I want to hide. Weddings. I want to skip the wedding. I don't want anyone looking at me as I enter the room. I want to disappear as everyone dances. Holidays. Everyone will look at my clothing and judge me. If I go pray, they will stare at me the whole time. I don't know what they really think. Social scenes. I cannot speak for fear they will think I am stupid. What if I become flustered.

Why do I care, I constantly ask myself? What if I just left my house and felt free of worries. I want to speak my mind without worrying how people will react. I want to be like all those other people who seem relaxed while participating in a conversation. I envy those who laugh without thinking they sound strange.

I don't want to feel others are better than me because of the amount of money they spend on clothing. I want to look like I have it together as I walk around. When people see me, I want to leave a confident impression.

Why is what others think so important to me? Why does that effect many decisions I make?  Why do I spend so many hours thinking about all these questions and thoughts?

Is it possible for me to go with my gut? Is it possible to make the decision I know I want and stick with it? Can I go to future events and not be consumed with thoughts of anyone's opinion but mine? I really want to go into places without feeling self conscious. How about being able to walk up to someone and introduce myself? How I long for all of this. These thoughts are always on my mind. 

I would really like things to be different moving forward. I need to use a lot of positive self talk to encourage myself in many areas. I need to notice the times I do something well, or better. Those are the moments to think about a lot. I need to build on them.

www.zahavahselingerlmhc.com

Zahavah Selinger, LMHC is a licensed therapist with a private practice located in Crown Heights and Flatbush. She focuses on self-esteem, depression and anxiety with both children and adults. To set up a free consultation contact her at zahavahsel@gmail.com or 845-596-1321. Video sessions are available as well.