Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 18th, 2021

Pesachim 117 Is being joyful important to religion? There is no question about it, that Judaism has plenty of bitter and dark descriptions of worship and devotion. In our Gemara on Amud Aleph teaches us that a student must be filled with trepidation when he studies under his master. The Talmud (Berachos 30a) stresses the somber requirements in prayer and service. Yet, joy is considered essential in worship and divine connection. The Talmud states …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 17th, 2021

What destroys the human spirit more, spiritual bondage or physical bondage? It is possible to have every benefit and every luxury and still feel utterly miserable, empty and void. This is torture. On the other hand, it is also possible to be wise and fulfilled, yet suffer under incredible oppression. Our Gemara records an argument between Rav and Shmuel as to what aspect of our suffering is recalled in the Exodus story. The Mishna tells us that t …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 12th, 2021

 Why is curiosity important? It is important because it creates an anticipation and a need that wants to be satisfied. When children are properly curious, they remain motivated and open to find out about and study things intrinsically for its own sake. Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses removing the table during the Seder to cause the children to wonder and ask questions. The Rabbis understood well that promoting curiosity is the best way for …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 15th, 2021

Our Gemara discusses the halakhic requirements of intention, kavannah, when performing mitzvos.  However, regardless of the halakhic requirement, we can all understand that there is value in being mindful and having full intention when performing a mitzvah. The question is, what is that intention?  The simple idea would be to have intention that one is performing the mitzvah as per G-d‘s commandment. Furthermore, there are mystica …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 14th, 2021

Is it better to stay in a loveless marriage in order to provide stability for your children? Our Gemara on amud Beis alludes to the ethical pros and cons of someone forced to continue in a marriage either due to needs of the children, or financial pressures of an unaffordable divorce settlement.   There are people who feel compelled to stay in a marriage for the sake of the children, and sometimes even due to financial reasons. While to …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 12th, 2021

Are Second Marriages More Likely to End in Divorce? What factors can help predict long term stability in second marriages? Our Gemara at the end of amud aleph advises against a divorced man from marrying a divorced woman, the Gemara warns: There are four minds in the bed during intimacy. Each person thinks about his current and former spouse. What does the research say about second marriages? In general, there are consistent indications that seco …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 12th, 2021

Do demons exist? If so, what are they? Our Gemara here mentions them in a variety of scenarios that show them to be living creatures, who live and die, need space and otherwise share the earth with the rest of humanity. It is well-known that the Rambam did not believe in demons, see for example commentary on the Mishna (Avoda Zara 4:7) where he lists belief in demons amongst the defective and degenerate ideas that come from idolatry. Whenever a h …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 11th, 2021

Much as we would like to ignore it, it is in our nature to be superstitious.  You will say, “Not me, I don’t believe in any of this stuff.”  Really?  I will prove you wrong with this thought experiment, but brace yourself, trigger warning here: Think of a dear loved one. Now hold that image and imagine them being murdered. There is no good word to describe the ickyness and dread of that feeling.  This proves, …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 10th, 2021

There are often situations in family life that the needs of consistency and dedication to Torah study clash with the needs and welfare of our children.  It is often not easy to know what comes first, because on the one hand, every family matter is urgent, and on the other hand if every matter is urgent, Torah Mah Tehei Aleha, the Torah, what will be of her?”  Any decent human being who also is dedicated to Torah intense study grap …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 9th, 2021

You don’t have to be a brilliant sociologist to note that women’s status has changed dramatically in the last hundred years, throughout the world.  The subject of the status of women in Torah thought and society is emotionally and psychologically complex, and anxiety provoking.  There are those who try to shut down discussion about these matters because of fear of heresy.  There are others who engage in gaslighting and …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 5th, 2021

Talent is a gift, but character is a choice ― John C. Maxwell How do you work with the most irritating person in the world, Who knows all your tricks, and is as bad as you and is as good as you? Yes, I’m talking about yourself. All of us have a wellspring of talents and deficits, sensitivities and weaknesses. How do we use what we have and not lie to ourselves? Our Gemara on amud Beis and Tosafos (“Dilma”) Discuss the concept …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 7th, 2021

Often, we ignore our own internal warning signs. A small tightening of our gut, a feeling like something is a bit off, maybe even literally, a pain in the neck or a headache. We have these sensations while agreeing to doing something we don’t really want to do, or perhaps we are in the process of making a self-destructive choice out of anger or frustration that we are turning inward. It is a skill of a mature individual to be mindful enough …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 5th, 2021

Sometimes the halakha tells you all you need to know and you should not bother overthinking it. Many veterans parents of teenagers went through stormy Friday nights where their child slept through or maybe even stormed out of the seudah.  It’s scary and it hurts when your child rejects an important family ritual. Don’t take it personally. Let it go. He or she will wake up hungry the next day. Don’t carry the fight over. Jus …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 5th, 2021

Pesachim 104 What is the secret to long life? Everyone wants to know the answer to that. Our sages had their own ideas about what gives a person merit so that he or she may achieve the blessings of long life. On amud beis, a particular assurance of blessings for long life is given for reciting the following formula in the closing of havdalah (important: we don’t follow this nusach halakhically.) תָּנָא מִשְּׁמֵיהּ דְּר …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 4th, 2021

Our Gemara on amud beis provides the text for the Havdalah blessing which includes giving thanks for not only the distinction between holy and profane, but also include distinction between lightness and darkness. Clearly, the havdalah blessing isn’t merely a farewell to Shabbos. Rather, it is a meditation about the importance of distinctions, and even the importance of things we would consider undesirable. Let us give some thought to the id …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 3rd, 2021

In what ways does mindfulness relate to Jewish observance and practice? I believe the idea that a person be fully aware of what he or she is doing and appreciate it is central to Jewish practice and observance, and is the epitome of kavannah. The Gemara discusses the principle אין עושים מצות חבילות חבילות we do not double up and bundle mitzvos together and perform them at the same time. Therefore, if one was in a meal that …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 2nd, 2021

Why does Judaism constantly involve physical celebrations eating, drinking, gold, silver, weddings and every other kind of festive occasion? Why not just go onto some mountaintop and meditate? The Gemara on amud aleph Discusses Shmuel‘s principle of אֵין קִידּוּשׁ אֶלָּא בִּמְקוֹם סְעוּדָה There is no valid kiddush except in the place of one’s Shabbas meal. The Gemara then sites an incident as a pro …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

March 1st, 2021

Can A marriage recover after infidelity? Few betrayals equals a betrayal of a spouse who committed sexual infidelity. Often, aside from the obvious feeling of betrayal, there is a sense of victimization, humiliation, gaslighting, and self-recrimination that make it difficult to recover. The Gemara on amud aleph quotes the verse in Esther (7:8) הֲגַם לִכְבּוֹשׁ אֶת הַמַּלְכָּה עִמִּי בַּבָּיִת״ Will he …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 28th, 2021

Who is really wealthy? This has been the classic question for humanity throughout time as we chase physical pleasures and benefits to stave off our existential fear of our irrelevance and impending death. The Mishna on Amud beis informs us that even the poorest person on Passover eve should conduct himself as if he were from the wealthy class. That is he should drink and eat while leaning as if he were royalty, even though in a material sense he …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 26th, 2021

Quote Source: Wayne Thiebaud How does one achieve spiritual connection? Is it via expansive ecstatic joy? Or is it through limitation and abnegation? The Gemara on amud beis discusses the problem of אין מביאים קדשים לבית הפסול which means we are not to allow situations that would artificially limit the amount of time a particular sacrifice is to be consumed. That is for example, a Bechor first born sacrifice that is usually …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 26th, 2021

The Gemara on amud aleph mentions the concept of Ta’un Linah, which is that certain sacrifices such as a the Korban Pesach require staying overnight in Yerushalayim.  What does this represent?   Be’er Mayyim Chayyim (Bereishis 32:14) discusses this phenomenon. He notes that Yaakov Avinu stayed overnight after his prayer and draws a parallel to the similar obligation by sacrifices. I think this tells us something important ab …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 25th, 2021

Recently, because of COVID, people have brought into question the custom of kissing the Mezuzah.  What is the significance of this custom? My father, who was a Talmid of Rav Hutner, ZT’L, was not big into PDRP, Public Displays of Religious Piety, and so he would not kiss the mezuzah amongst other practices.  He would say, the chovos halevavos, duties of the heart, are more important than a tangible act.  Fair enough, but what …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 23rd, 2021

Should one give up a happy family time such as a Seder Night in order to keep someone company who is alone in a hospital?  Is the spiritual sacrifice worth it? The Gemara on Amud Aleph states a surprising ruling. Although one may bring a Paschal sacrifice by himself if there is no other option, the importance of bringing it together with another person even allows another to purposely render himself ritually impure in order to legally allow …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 22nd, 2021

fQuote Credit: Albert Einstein What makes something true?  Is there such a thing as objective facts, or is everything subject to context that reality itself is impossible to be separated from the internal phenomenon of the observer?  For example, sound or a color are collection of waves along a certain frequency.  Not only is it impossible to know how another organism or alien would see or hear, it is even impossible to know if two …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 21st, 2021

When is it time to cut your losses and bail out?  We see warning signs of social and political unrest, huge gaps between rich and poor, increased anti-semitic rhetoric and propoganda, as well as all many of the fascist tropes such as, “Stay in your homes for your own safety”.  Oy, when the government starts telling that they are worried about our safety and want us to “shelter in place”, this is the time to get w …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 20th, 2021

What makes a person alive? Is life something that either is, or isn’t? Or, Are some people more alive than others? If so, how is it determined? In the Mishna on Amud Aleph, Hillel uses a melitza to back up a rabbinic decree. Hillel holds that a convert who converted on Passover eve cannot partake from the Paschal sacrifice and instead must undergo the same purification rituals as one who comes in contact with a corpse. That is, to be sprink …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 19th, 2021

Of what is the purpose of the Jewish exile? Are we just misbehaving children sent by G-d into a epic millennial time-out?  Is there something of deeper meaning and purpose? The Gemara on amud aleph quotes a verse from Zephaniah (3:13): שְׁאֵרִ֨ית יִשְׂרָאֵ֜ל לֹֽא־יַעֲשׂ֤וּ עַוְלָה֙ וְלֹא־יְדַבְּר֣וּ כָזָ֔ב וְלֹֽא־יִמָּצֵ֥א בְּפִיהֶ֖ם לְשׁ֣וֹן …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 19th, 2021

Can a robot ever replace a rabbi? Can a Watson-style AI know enough halakha to render psakim? One day soon we will be confronted with such a situation. Let’s study a recent man vs machine situation: The Gemara on amud aleph quotes a pasuk found in Shemos (12:4)  אִם יִמְעַט הַבַּיִת מִהְיוֹת מִשֶּׂה And if the household be too little for a lamb There is a fabulous story about Rav Chaim Kanievsky, Shlit& …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 18th, 2021

  Are prizes a good method to motivate children?  In other words, what is superior? Is intrinsic motivation, that is, finding what a person is naturally drawn toward and amplifying effective?  Or, is extrinsic motivation more powerful such as financial incentives.   The Mishna on amud aleph and the Gemara relate a story about a man who wanted to motivate his children to be zealous in their performance of the Pesach mitzva …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 17th, 2021

What does it mean to be comfortable with yourself? People strive to become confident, lacking in undue shame, to feel complete and calm.    The Gemara on Amud aleph discusses verse and prophecies that refer to Messianic times: אֶלָּא, לֹא כְּאַבְרָהָם שֶׁכָּתוּב בּוֹ ״הַר״, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״אֲשֶׁר יֵאָמֵר הַיּוֹם בְּהַר ה׳ יֵרָאֶה״, וְלֹא כּ …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 16th, 2021

We live in a society that does not encourage delay of gratification.  Why should we wait for anything?  How does being sexually abstinent prior to marriage provide any benefit other than being frustrated?   The Gemara on amud aleph quotes a verse in Psalms (114:12) which by way of derash equates behaving modesty and remaining chaste until marriage to building the Temple. ״מְחֻטָּבוֹת תַּבְנִית הֵיכָל …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 15th, 2021

When is a “no” real, and when is it really an invitation to prove our love? Gemara amud beis provides ethical advice on how to be a good guest: “Anything your host says to you, you should do, except for an inappropriate request, such as if he says to leave.” Be’er Mayyim Chayyim (Shemos 10:1) understands this directive metaphysically.  Meaning, that G-d is the host, and that one is not obligated to “leave& …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 14th, 2021

  Why does Hashem not hear our prayers?  If He is omnipotent, why can He not do us a “small” favor. Perhaps cure my neighbor of cancer, or send me a winning lottery ticket.  To quote Tevye, “Would it spoil some vast eternal plan, if I were a wealthy man?”  Let’s find out. The Gemara after the Mishna on Amud beis notes that according to Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi, “Even a barrier of iron does no …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 12th, 2021

The Gemara on amud aleph relates the famous principle that a prohibition which is transgressed without an action usually does not incur the punishment of malkus, lashes. For example in our Gemara, leaving the Paschal sacrifice uneaten until the morning, while being a violation of the scriptural ordinance, does not incur lashes because it is violated passively.  What is the reason that there is less punishment when the transgression is passiv …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 12th, 2021

The Torah is rich with parables and models for human behavior. The best part is not the successes of its heroes, but rather their challenges and stumblings. Our Gemara on the top of amud aleph references a disputation between Aharon, Moshe, Elazar and Isamar.  After the death of Nadav and Avihu, there was a sacrifice that remained to be eaten.  Moshe was angry that the sacrifice was not consumed, and feared that this would be another ma …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 11th, 2021

  When is it proper to enjoy your hard earned, or maybe not so hard earned wealth, and when should a person hold back off on ostentatious displays?  I am not referring to the obvious value in living modestly.  Instead, I am referring to a legitimate celebration such as wedding.  On the one hand, why not make a giant seudas mitzvah and invite as many family and friends to share this blessed moment?  On the other hand, perh …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 10th, 2021

The Gemara on top of amud Beis tells us a rule that we do not use a kal v’chomer inference to derive a new Halakha from a halakha l’moshe misinai. That is a purely oral tradition with no source in the scripture cannot be used as a source to make additional derivations via kal v’chomer, and according to many commentaries, any of the 13 hermeneutical principles.  We should ask, what is the reason for this position? Especially …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 8th, 2021

Diversity within Community What is the role of different ethnicities within Judaism?  Is it merely a coincidence of history that Jews who lived in different cultures and climates developed different characteristics and customs?  Are a Yekke’s timeliness and fastidiousness merely because they are like Germans?  Are Litvaks austere, stony, intellectual and skeptical and Galitzianers emotional and warm due to random causes? Our …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 8th, 2021

Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the aspect of the burning of parts of the Sacrifices as providing a pleasant scent to G-d. What, in fact, does a Korban represent to G-d?  

The Torah often uses the phrase Reyach Nichoach, “A Pleasant Scent” in explaining what Hashem derives from the offering.  On the one hand, the reference to the term smell would seem to be the Torah’s way of distancing G-d from nee …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R

February 7th, 2021

The Gemara on amud aleph discusses the function of the Tzitz, the gold headplate worn by the Cohen Gadol. Let us focus on this unusual artifact and how the Ishbitzer (Mei HaShiloach II, Shemos, Tetzaveh 9) interprets its position in the verse and on the body.  The verses in Shemos (28:42-46) juxtapose the description of the Tzitz’s form and function to the Cohen’s pants.  The Tzitz represents the highest part of the Cohen Go …
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