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Pathology and Partnership: When Personality Disorders Meet Couples Counseling

Previously Recorded
Simcha Feuerman, LCSW-R, DHL
$59.99 Cost For Member: $39.99

This presentation begins by defining personality disorders (PDs) as enduring, maladaptive patterns of behavior and inner experience that impair relationships, with a focus on Cluster B disorders like Narcissistic (NPD) and Borderline (BPD) Personality Disorders due to their prevalence in couples counseling. We’ll explore how PDs manifest as an "Emotional Ponzi Scheme House of Cards," where fragile defenses (e.g., grandiosity in NPD, splitting in BPD) create volatile dynamics—such as idealization-devaluation cycles or boundary violations—that destabilize partnerships. Drawing from sources like Landucci & Foley (2014), we’ll highlight common pairings (e.g., NPD+BPD, NPD+OCPD) and their unique challenges, including emotional volatility, poor insight, and countertransference risks for therapists. The introduction will emphasize the importance of recognizing these patterns early to tailor interventions effectively.


The second part outlines evidence-based interventions for couples with PDs, integrating eclectic strategies from Livesley’s (2005) phased approach—safety, containment, regulation, exploration, and integration—with specific techniques like boundary setting (Hafeez), DBT skills (Fruzzetti & Fruzzetti, 2003), and Gottman’s relational methods. We’ll discuss how therapists can serve as a “mirroring self-object” (Landucci & Foley) to validate injuries while fostering empathy and collaboration, illustrated through fictional case studies: “Laura and David” (NPD+BPD) navigating rage and abandonment fears, and “Alice and Eugene” (NPD+OCPD) balancing drama and control. The presentation concludes with practical tips—establishing a holding environment, managing countertransference, and setting common goals—supported by sources like Lachkar (1998), to equip clinicians with tools to stabilize these complex relationships.

About the Presenter

Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, LCSW-R, DHL is a seasoned psychotherapist specializing in high-conflict couples and families, as well as male sexual health. He maintains a private practice with offices in Brooklyn, Queens and Boca Raton

Learning Objectives:

  1. Describe the Core Features and Relational Dynamics of Personality Disorders in Couples
  2. Describe the Core Features and Relational Dynamics of Personality Disorders in Couples
  3. Analyze Common Couple Pairings and Their Therapeutic Challenges
  4. Develop Practical Strategies to Enhance Therapeutic Alliances with PD Couples
  5. Evaluate Treatment Outcomes and Adjust Interventions for PD Couples

Agenda:

Couples Counseling with Personality-Disordered Persons

Total Duration: 3 Hours (180 Minutes)

1. Introduction and Welcome (15 minutes)

  • Focus: Set the stage by welcoming participants, outlining objectives (e.g., understanding PD dynamics in couples, learning interventions), and briefly introducing the "Emotional Ponzi Scheme House of Cards" metaphor for PD relationships.
  • Activities: Brief icebreaker (e.g., "What’s one challenge you’ve faced with PD couples?") and overview of agenda.
  • Time: 0:00–0:15

2. Understanding Personality Disorders in Couples: Theory and Dynamics (45 minutes)

  • Focus: Define PDs (APA Dictionary, Cleveland Clinic), focusing on Cluster B (NPD, BPD) and their relational impact (e.g., volatility, boundary issues). Explore common pairings (Landucci & Foley, 2014) and defense mechanisms (Bowins, 2013) like compensation and splitting.
  • Activities: Lecture with slides, 5-minute Q&A to clarify concepts.
  • Time: 0:15–1:00

3. Treatment Approaches: Frameworks and Strategies (50 minutes)

  • Focus: Present Livesley’s (2005) phased approach (safety to integration), integrating specific techniques—boundary setting (Hafeez), DBT (Fruzzetti & Fruzzetti, 2003), Gottman’s methods, and the therapist’s role as a mirroring self-object (Landucci & Foley). Discuss countertransference management (Gordon et al., 2020).
  • Activities: Lecture with examples, 10-minute small-group discussion (“Which technique fits your practice?”).
  • Time: 1:00–1:50

4. Break (15 minutes)

  • Focus: Allow participants to rest, network, and process material.
  • Time: 1:50–2:05

5. Case Studies and Practical Application (40 minutes)

  • Focus: Present fictional cases—“Laura and David” (NPD+BPD) and “Rebecca and Michael” (NPD+OCPD)—to illustrate dynamics (rage/abandonment, drama/control) and interventions (validation, skill-building, goal-setting). Highlight holding environments (Lachkar, 1998).
  • Activities: Case walkthrough, 10-minute role-play exercise (e.g., setting a boundary with a narcissist).
  • Time: 2:05–2:45

6. Wrap-Up and Q&A (25 minutes)

  • Focus: Summarize key takeaways (e.g., eclectic approaches, empathy, structure), offer practical tips for clinicians, and address remaining questions.
  • Activities: Recap with slides, open-floor Q&A, distribute handouts (e.g., resource list).
  • Time: 2:45–3:10 (ending slightly early to respect time)

This workshop offers 3 Continuing Education Credits
This webinar is recorded and will not grant live credits.

This presentation is open to:
  • Social Workers
  • Professional Counselors
  • Therapists
  • Psychologists
  • Licensed Mental Health Practitioners
  • Medical Doctors and Other Health Professionals
  • Other professionals interacting with populations engaged in mental health based services
Course Level: intermediate
Level of Clinician: intermediate
  • New practitioners who wish to gain enhanced insight surrounding the topic
  • Experienced practitioners who seek to increase and expand fundamental knowledge surrounding the subject matter
  • Advanced practitioners seeking to review concepts and reinforce practice skills and/or access additional consultation
  • Managers seeking to broaden micro and/or macro perspectives

Participants will receive their certificate electronically upon completion of the webinar and course evaluation form.

Disability Access - If you require ADA accommodations, please contact our office 30 days or more before the event. We cannot ensure accommodations without adequate prior notification. Please Note: Licensing Boards change regulations often, and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific board’s approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling. The grievance policy for trainings provided by NEFESH INTERNATIONAL is available here Satisfactory Completion Participants must have paid the tuition fee, logged in and out each day, attended the entire workshop, and completed an evaluation to receive a certificate (If this is a pre-recorded program, a post-test with a passing grade of 80% to receive a certificate.) Failure to log in or out will result in forfeiture of credit for the entire course. No exceptions will be made. Partial credit is not available. Certificates are available after satisfactory course completion by clicking here.
There is no conflict of interest or commercial support for this program.
  • CE You! is an approved sponsor of the Maryland Board of Social Work Examiners for continuing education credits for licensed social workers in Maryland.
    CE You! maintains responsibility for this program.
Refund Policy:
Full Refund until 48 hours before scheduled date.
48 hours before: full refund less $5.00 processing fee. After event no refund will be given.
*exclusions apply for reasonable need and cause.